Marwell Zoo

•July 21, 2008 • 3 Comments

This was definitely one of those days when you start when the place opens and don’t leave until you’re pracitcally asked to. Having arrived just after the gates opened the day began with what I can only describe as the worst smelling animals on Earth.

Penguins

These feathery little critters are supposedly some of the more entertaining animals at the Zoo, and sure they look pretty cool but at such an early hour in the morning they are about as entertaining as any self-respecting teenager who still hasn’t managed to drag themselves out of bed. Still, they gave a good indication that there would be a lot to see today even if half the buggers would be snoozing, or just enjoying the warmth of the sun.

The animals of the Zoo vary from, well just about everything really. That said, it is probably one of the few that does not have any lions, but this doesn’t really bother me because lions are probably the worst of the big cats. They’re incredibly boring and they all look exactly the same. More interesting, better looking and just generally cooler, you get these guys.

Cheetah

Easily the best of the big cats, the cheetahs were probably one of the more captivating animals of the day, despite lounging in the morning sun for the entire time that they were being watched. They’re quite interesting to watch though, they have similar characteristics as the domestic cat yet there’s something extremely dog-like about them.

About halfway around the Zoo a break was taken for lunch, and the Road Train delivers those of us that had managed to steal the few remaining seats back to the car park to grab a picnic before returning to the Road Train to resume where we left off. As the afternoon grew on there were a lot more animals awake also caused one of my main problems to arise; children. Animals who are asleep and away from the crowds don’t entertain children because they’re not doing anything, as soon as one wakes up or even moves slightly, every child within a five meter radius runs between you and the window or fence blocking any possible view you previously had. Definitely do not visit anywhere at the weekend or during school holidays for the sake of your own enjoyment. Ignoring this one downside to the day the Zoo is probably the best of the places I have been able to visit this year. It is more cost effective than the Aquarium as you can easily lose the whole day and is far more enjoyable than both of the Museums.

Marwell Zoo pulls in a quality 4.5/5. Children have a horrible habbit of ruining anything that could be good.

Pyrhus

“My Latest Work”

•July 19, 2008 • 7 Comments

Impostor

For my own amusement; a short list of people ranked from best to worst.

King Leonidas of Sparta
Tom Hanks
Matthew Bellamy
David Bowman
Noah
Martin Luther King
Tony Blair
Christian Bale
Stevie Wonder
King Henry VIII
Genghis Khan
Julius Ceasar
Diana, Princess of Wales
Barack Obama
Nelson Mandella
Ghandi
Queen Elizabeth II
Osama Bin Laden
Elton John
Gordon Brown
Chris Martin
Jesus
Paris Hilton
Pope Benedict XVI
Sadam Hussein
George W. Bush
Adolf Hitler
J.K. Rowling
Margaret Thatcher
Robert Mugabe
Moses
Bob Geldof
Bono
Madeline McCann
Alex Robinson

Pyrhus

The Summer

•July 16, 2008 • Leave a Comment

I’ve got to get up for work tomorrow at about 7am which is pretty much the worst part of my life but fuckit, the money should give me a good summer!

Basically, I figured I should let the one; or two of you, who come and go what’s going on here. There’s not been a proper update in a fucking age and I’ve not really got much time what with employment being a key feature of the last, and following two weeks.

Plans then! I’m looking to get a post out once a week as of August (not quite accurate as I’ll be lacking in PC access for most of September) and try to get this place really going somewhere even if it is just another .wordpress blog. Hey, if it works I could consider going all out on a website but the chances of that are pretty slim considering funding and my complete lack of coding knowledge but still, it’s an idea.
I’ve got a lot of ideas running and flowing in my head at the moment but I need the time to put them on here, some details perhaps? A review and a couple of pictures of Marwell Zoo, something interesting involving certain dates, a quick overview of the last 6 months in music, possibly a basic review of Reading Festival if I get time and ultimately, endless rants about people, places, and inanimate objects.

Until August.

Pyrhus

Are you Gay?

•June 23, 2008 • 2 Comments

Long time no see, but that’ll come another time!

So, here I am sitting on a friend’s laptop, at a friend’s house while the said friend is currently at college. You may be wondering what I’m doing, and unfortunately it is completely legitimate behaviour.

I’m awaiting the delivery of my Projekt Revolution tickets which have had two attempted deliveries so far, my friend is at college from 9-5 generally speaking and is unable to be around when the tickets are likely to arrive and his mother is out of the country.

Anyway, he came home for lunch and we were sitting infront of the T.V. watching music channels and That’s What You Get by Paramore came on. Normally, this is no problem because Hayley Williams is easily the hottest thing under the sun, but something went wrong…

My friend began asking when Josh Farro became a man, when did he go from the skinny, fringed emo kid to the tall, muscular…at which point I stopped him. Who sits there watching Hayley Williams and begins dicussing the attractiveness of the male guitarist, if my friend was female or openly homosexual I’d show some tolerance but he’s neither.

Conclusion: Faggot.

Pyrhus

Missing the Feeling

•May 26, 2008 • 1 Comment

Sarah looked up from the table as she heard voices out in the corridor; the first few guests were arriving to the party she assumed. She quickly established that both low-pitched drones belonged to males and she wished that they would walk through into the kitchen so she could see who they were and be introduced to them.
Katie recognised his voice the moment she heard the front door close; she’d hoped he would be one of the first to arrive so she could spend as long as possible in his company without other people trying to get his, or her attention. She knew she’d have to introduce him to Sarah though and she hoped that Sarah wouldn’t notice him in the same way that she did.

Jake walked through the door and into the kitchen, where he assumed the other guests that had arrived would be. He was already feeling pretty mashed and hoped that it wouldn’t be too much longer until other people were.
Craig followed Jake through the door, knowing how much his friend had already drunk, and how little he normally needed before he would be unaware of what was going on. Craig knew who would be in the kitchen as he looked around at the people who were gathered around the table but for a few seconds longer than he should have, his gaze rested on the face of the girl he did not recognise.
Jake, completely oblivious to most of the people in the room, staggered somewhat over to the chair next to Katie and slumped down. He smiled at her and around at everyone else in greeting.

Katie was completely oblivious to Jake; she had just witnessed the one thing she had hoped would not happen. She had seen straight passed Jake as he had walked through the door at at Craig, he was smiling at her and she smiled back but then his gaze moved around the room; her eyes followed his. Her stomach flipped when her eyes reached Sarah, she was clearly checking him out! Katie’s eyes quickly turned to a hard stare and glared into the face of her friend.
Sarah was disapointed when Jake walked through the door and almost lost interest when somebody else followed him in; someone she felt was definitely worth her interest. She watched as he smiled around the room before resting on her, his eyes locked onto hers and she felt her skin start to warm; then she noticed something else. Katie was glaring at her and too late Sarah had realised who this was; this was the Craig she had been hearing so much about in recent weeks. She had longed to meet him to find out if he was all Katie made him out to be and so far he was beating all descriptions; she looked back at Katie and in an “I-could-care-less” tone asked her what she was looking at her in that way for.
Katie returned Sarah’s question with her classic “You-know-what-I-mean” glance and hoped that Craig hadn’t noticed the brief clash between the two of them.

Craig had heard Sarah’s question of Katie’s look and knew exactly what was going on. A few of Katie’s friends had been slipping somewhat obvious hints into conversations that they had been having with him over past few weeks and what he had just observed proved all speculation. More interesting for him however was the look he had recieved from Sarah, he would have assumed that someone of her physique would have looked him straight over as she had obviously done with Jake, but her eyes had given her away.
Jake paid little attention to what was going on around him, none of these people were his friends he knew them all through Craig and they were obviously more interested in him. Jake reached down into his bag and pulled out another can of Strongbow and began to drink himself further into his own world.

Katie had wished she’d been paying more attention to Jake when he slumped himself down next to her as the only free chair left around the table was next to Sarah and she had no doubt that Craig would take it.
Sarah knew that the evening would only get worse between her and Katie if she made strong moves on Craig so she occupied herself with talking to Jake, who Craig had informed her was a huge fan of wrestling.

Jake was bemused with the idea of someone talking to him, but Sarah was making conversation and amazingly he found that she was as big a fan of wrestling as he was. The conversation continued for a while and he found himself in a more sociable state.

Katie was glad to see that Sarah had decided to talk over her with Jake, and took the opportunity to talk with Craig about how his day had been. She suddenly felt guilty for being so harsh with Sarah, but at the same time felt glad that Sarah had not been overly bothered. Sarah knew that Katie still hadn’t told Craig how she felt and that, in Sarah’s eyes, made him fair game to all involved but fortunately for Katie, Sarah was being the friend she loved.

The evening progressed very quickly from those opening moments and things went from good to worse for Katie. Jake had begun being very flirtatious with a new female arrival and the alcohol that had passed through Sarah had led her to disregard her friendship for the boy on the seat next to her. She let out a slight sigh of relief when Craig got up to talk with some of his friends who had arrived, and a greater sigh when someone had promptly sat in the chair he was in. She felt that things would improve again but she did not expect what happened next.
Sarah was glad when Jake had ended the conversation to talk with another girl, she found him entertaining to talk to but would have prefered to be getting to know Craig. Katie hadn’t done anything about it yet so what was stopping her? She had given her friend plenty of time and knew that if anything was going to happen between the two of them it would have. Sarah knew that was mainly the alcohol talking, but for once she felt like it made more sense than ignoring her own attraction.

Craig was glad that Jake had left Sarah to talk with someone else, he appreciated Katie’s friendship but that where his feelings started and ended with her. There was no attraction for him, as for her friend Sarah he could already sense what lay beneath. While they were talking, he would notice Katie glance over with the look of a lost sheep on her face and he felt a pang of guilt. He found an escape from the situation when a couple of his other friends entered the kitchen cheering and laughing about their journey to the party. After sharing a couple of jokes Craig found himself wanting to return to Sarah, he turned towards the table to find his seat taken but noticed that Sarah was sitting enough to one side of her chair for him to slide up next to her.

Katie was almost devastated by Craig’s next move. He didn’t loiter just between the two girls when he returned to their conversation. but instead slid onto the edge of Sarah’s chair, making some excuse about her obviously stealing his when infact his had been taken by someone else. Katie could see Sarah approve of this and allowed him to get more comfortable.
Sarah was somewhat shocked that Craig sat down next to her on her chair, but was also completely pleased by it. She hadn’t intentionally sat to one side but was completely glad that she had, she felt his leg slide down her’s as he adjusted to get more comfortable and she felt a burst of adrenaline fire through her body.
Katie knew that some how she had to move the two apart for her the sake of her own feelings and for her friendship with Sarah. She quickly grabbed Sarah’s arm and told her that they had to go and get the rest of their alcohol from Katie’s flat, which was just across the road.
Sarah didn’t want to leave but she knew she couldn’t let her friend go alone, and regretfully told Craig she’d catch up with him later and left.

Craig was sligtly annoyed that Katie had dragged Sarah away from him when things were just beginning to get interesting but he convinced himself that things would continue when she returned. He turned to talk to Jake to find his friend was deeply engaged in a conversation with a girl Craig had never met before. He thought of the chances of them both getting lucky in the same night, laughed at the thought of Jake getting more than a phone number and went to explore the rest of the party.

Riddle

Futile Pursuits

•May 24, 2008 • 2 Comments

What was that for?
Don’t look at him like that!
Why not?
You can’t look at him like that because you know how I feel about him.
I’m only looking at him like that because I think he’s quite good looking, I’m only paying you a compliment!
But what if he takes more interest in you because he catches you looking at him?
He won’t be interested in me, and besides I wouldn’t do anything!

You said you wouldn’t do anything!
I didn’t *do* anything! He came over to talk to me, that’s all!
You didn’t stop him like you said you would! You know how I feel and everything and now this.
We just spoke! He’s a nice enough guy but I don’t think he’s interested in anything more than friendship.
What?
He’s not looking for anyone at the moment, he’s content. I’m sorry.
Oh…

Riddle

Give It a Name ‘08

•May 13, 2008 • 1 Comment

Billy Talent
Fuck the event in general, it was awesome but all that really matters is one thing: BILLY TALENT.

Since starting University this is probably what I’ve been looking forward to most. It was probably the best live performance by any band I’ve ever seen. It’s been a day and I’ve still got both albums playing on repeat.

I was going to write a little review of the whole weekend, but instead I give you the following;

This Is How It Goes
Devil In A Midnight Mass
This Suffering
Line and Sinker
Try Honesty
Surrender
Perfect World
Fallen Leaves
Red Flag
The Ex

I was one person from the front and it was fan-fucking-tastic.

Pyrhus

The London Aquarium

•May 9, 2008 • Leave a Comment

So, having mentioned how this place would be a better spending of time than the Natural History Museum and the Science Museum I decided I should probably check it out.

Initially, there are two major problems to mention about the Aquarium; one is the price, the second is the hideous amounts of families that go to such places on bank holiday weekends. Children should be gathered up at the entrance and thrown in the shark tank; any that make it out alive should next be tested in the piranha tank. If they defeat this challenge then I guess I will have to accept them as being Super-Children so they shall be allowed to enjoy the fish and if not then the entertainment value of watching children eaten by sharks and piranha is off the scale!

Moving on from the petty annoyance that often comes with public displays I shall inform you of the positive side the Aquarium has to offer; it’s brilliant.

The Pacific Tank

This place is in the middle of London and it has sharks, fucking sharks, big massive fuck off sharks. Well, maybe not that big, but it’s still amazing to see such creatures swimming around in perhaps a tank that is too small for them to be held in comfortably. I was particularly in awe at the beauty and elegance of the Zebra Shark, and with the general “Wow, it’s a shark” feeling I get in situations. To put it blankly, sharks are fucking cool. This is a solid fact, one that children should not agree with because they get in the way, all of the time.
Apart from the sharks you have to give credit to the other fish, particularly the tropical fresh water fish, they give a good show of being brightly coloured and are nice to watch float around in their tanks.

All in all, the Aquarium is a pretty good show, because it’s not big enough to be classed as anything else. It takes approximately an hour and a half to slowly waltz around the whole place, that is too close to not long enough for my liking, especially considering I had to pay to get it. Fortunately the place is awesome and it recovers from the setbacks it faces every day.

So if you’re in London, have a spare £10, head over to the Jubilee Gardens for a show that definitely beats the Museums. This place is a solid 4/5.

Sharks man, sharks!

Pyrhus

Remember: None of us are called “Mom”.

•May 5, 2008 • 1 Comment

Congratulations, I mean it must be a really big achievement for you without Mummy about to show you how it’s done.
Actually, come to mention Mummy, it’s a shame she’s not here to show you how it’s done because once again you’ve managed to balls it up completely.
No surprise there though eh?

“Break into independence or be used and left behind like the rest of them.”

Childhood Disappointment

•April 20, 2008 • Leave a Comment

This weekend I had a rather delightful visitor to my home and together we made the decision that while in the area we should go and visit the Science Museum and the neighbouring Natural History Museum.

We had both been to the Museums as children and found them brilliant in every possible way and were both excited to find out what they were like now. Having set a whole day aside we were more than sure we’d get around enough of both of them.

The Science Museum
This place started off strong with the Secret Life of the Home; an exhibition in which you were able to watch how faeces are flushed through toilets, and the development of every day technology. I was enjoying myself at this point, and I think this was the most fun I had in the whole museum. Apart from the fact that there were too many people in the way of everything to properly enjoy any of it; all of these people had obnoxious and inconsiderate children in tow.
This made me wish everyone’s parents had as much control over their children as mine once did, especially at the points when I was trying to read something and some child came and stuck their greasy, unhygienic hands all over the glass of the article.
Beyond the children problem was the problem that science just isn’t as cool as it used to be. I know how most of the things in the place worked and I found myself failing to be fascinated.

The Science Museum scored an almighty 1/5. It would have been 0 but the humour that comes with watching a lump of faeces hit the lid of the toilet before actually making it into the bowl managed to scrape a point.

The Natural History Museum
In the past when I have visited this museum I had only been interested in the dinosaurs, which was a shock when we found we had to queue for about half an hour to enter the exhibition. Beyond the dinosaurs a second interest fell into the more modern animal life and the Blue Whale model that hung from the ceiling. However, on this visit I was far more interested in the geography and geology sections, spending a good two hours reading about precious stones and the discovery of a material with the same structure as the Kryptonite mentioned in Superman Returns.
I also found myself enjoying the Earth section, reading all the things I already knew about the planet and just generally chatting about geography with my acquaintance. Perhaps this is a sign of maturity developing as I’m no longer begging to see the dinosaurs, but happy to walk along at any pace admiring things of natural beauty and informing myself of the various ways that crystals form and the shapes that are produced through the processes.

The Natural History Museum scored an acceptable 3/5. A fourth point would have been achieved if there was no queue for the Dinosaurs, and a fifth would have come if I’d actually not been disapointed at the amount of rocks and stones that were missing for research.

I would suggest to anyone thinking about visiting the Museums to instead consider the London Aquarium. I imagine that would be far more entertaining, unless you’re into the Industrial Revolution or are truly British and love a good queue.

Pyrhus